I was hoping to do this earlier but I just haven’t had the time. The last time I posted something, it was July. A lot has changed in my life in those last 6 months. In fact, all of 2015 has been entirely life-changing. That’s what this post is basically going to be about. A recap of 2015 in William A.P.’s life.
2015. Holy hell. So much has happened in the last 365 days. Where do I even begin? It might easier to break this down into life categories.
Since May of 2014, I’ve been working at the NYL William O’Connor Midwood School, which is a special needs preschool. When 2015 rolled in, I was working as a 1:1 paraprofessional in a bilingual classroom. I wasn’t always happy in that classroom as I always felt like I was working beyond my job description and. In June, I was given the opportunity to move up and become a teaching assistant in a different bilingual classroom. I took the opportunity. The promotion meant having a salary for the first time in my life. It meant stability for myself and my mother. Of course, the money isn’t great but at least I no longer have to worry about where money is coming from when the school is closed like on holidays and the spring/summer breaks.
Okay, so this was one of the bigger ones. In 2015, I started graduate school. Back in July, I was accepted to both Hunter College and Brooklyn College. I decided to go with Brooklyn and thus am now studying Secondary Education in English (aka grades 7-12 English teacher). It has been absolutely insane. I’m not sure why I thought it would be a good idea to take 4 classes while working full-time but that’s what I did in my first semester in grad school and boy did it kick my ass. I’m still waiting for my grades to find out if I kicked back hard enough but I’ve at least taken the first steps in becoming an English teacher, which will be completely life altering.
If anyone knows me, they know that I am a huge romantic and a sap. I’m all about romantic love. It’s probably what I prioritize most in life as I honestly believe love to be one of the most important things in life and one of the most amazing/beautiful things in life. As such, my initial thought was to put this section first but I thought better of it. Quite a bit has happened in the last 365 days in my love life. At the beginning of 2015, I was in the middle of a 2.5+ year long relationship. Truth be told, I thought that I was going to marry her. We had even talked about getting engaged and looked and engagement rings. I was wrong. After 2 years and 8 months of constant fighting and compromising and crying and trying to force something to work that just wasn’t going to work, her and I decided to call it quits. Technically she broke up with me but we had talked about it before. We both knew it wasn’t working and we still tried to make it work even after we broke up, but it just wasn’t right. So after all of the time and energy we both spent on the relationship, it was over. We split up amicably and I have no ill feelings towards her. She’s a great person and I wish her absolutely nothing but the best. We just weren’t right for each other.
After that relationship ended, I was starting to feel hopeless. I tried to get back out in the dating world and found little to no success and way out of place with how most people my age engage in dating. With my lack of success prior to my ex and my lack of success in the current dating pool, I was convinced that my new ex was my last chance of finding love and happiness and marriage and a family and all that other shit that I’ve been chasing since I was a little kid bribing girls to kiss me for a gummy bear. I was beginning to feel hopeless. I thought I had missed me shot. I was wrong.
In late October, I met and began talking to a co-worker. At first I didn’t think anything of it but it was definitely something. For the first time, it all just makes sense. I’ve never felt so sure of anything. Everything that I’ve learned and experienced from my past relationships and/or any other time I’ve been involved with a woman has lead me to this, to her. I’m in a new relationship and I couldn’t be happier. Just when I thought all hope was lost, she restored my hope.
When I was in my last relationship, I was not always the best friend. I dedicated so much time and effort into the relationship that I alienated my friends and just didn’t make enough time for them. Fortunately, my friends are awesome anyway. When my ex and I broke up, and I was a mess, my friends were there for me. Whether it was taking me to a bar in the city, just talking, or guiding me through every girl I mistaken for a potential future. In that time, I really saw who my real friends are. For the first time ever, I felt good about my friends, who they were, where I fit in, and my relationship with them each. For the first time, I had my “boys,” (and one female friend – I didn’t forget you, Adele) and they mean a lot to me. I’m sure they’re all gonna rip on me for this later on today, but they all mean a lot to me and I love em all, even when some of them piss me off. Now that I’m in a new relationship, they’ve been great about it and I know that I have to make sure I don’t make the same mistakes I made in my previous relationship.
While a lot of people tend to have negative feelings towards 2015, I can’t really complain. 2015 was a huge year for me. I learned a lot about myself. There was heartache, loss, love, hope, acceptance, promotion, revelations, rebirth, death, and a Mets World Series run. It was definitely a year I won’t soon forget. I can’t wait for 2016 to start tomorrow.